On every big screen in bars, restaurants, and bachelor pads this week is the relentless coverage of the NCAA March Madness. My living room included.
You know what I’m doing? Not watching it. I know nothing about college basketball, and March has been especially hectic work-wise, school-wise, and LIFE-wise. Do I have time, or the interest, to pick out arbitrary teams on a chart based on what names or uniforms I like, and roll my eyes in feigned disappointment as my teams lose? Then fake excitement when they win? Not this year, buddy!
What follows is a short list of painful tasks I’d rather do than watch March Madness.
- Clean filth. I would rather vacuum tufts of dog hair and dust bunnies from behind my couch and little kernels of kibble smushed into the couch cushions. I’d rather do that, than watch game after game of March Madness.
- Slog through work. I’d rather bury myself in the large (virtual) pile of homework and projects for grad school and all the anxiety that comes with not having time to finish it. I’d rather do that, than watch sportscasters fall over themselves and the upsets and blowouts of March Madness.
- Run in ice-cold misery. Forecast: 40 degrees but feels like 29? Wind gusts at 25 miles per hour, whipping at my cheeks as a cruel reminder that though “spring” officially arrived, Mother Nature has other plans? Sign me up for a run! I’d rather wheeze through the cold air burning my out-of-shape lungs—than watch March Madness.
Well… looks like there was an upside. Super productive this weekend. Thanks March Madness!